- Smart man + smart woman = romance
- Smart man + dumb woman = affair
- Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
- Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
- A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
- A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
- A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
- A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
- A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
- To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
- To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
- Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
- A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
- A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
- A woman has the last word in any argument.
- Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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